Anxiety is never patient.

I've not written in sometime. This post is a little musings about anxiety. As I know it, as I've come to learn about it and deal with it.

School brings with it new hope, new fear and new dread. I live a life of constant fear of doing something wrong. This year, I really haven't given a shit. which has spun my anxiety in a different direction. Almost kind of exciting. Making mistakes are necessary in life. They are not something you can teach, but what you get out of making mistakes is more valuable than you would know. I live a more conscious life on social media, I pick up on triggers and talk to people. Compliment people, if at least I am empty inside they might feel a little bit better.

That's all I can really ask for, if people around me are happy I become a hell of a lot more content with surroundings. Not to say I'm not selfish at times. Sometimes it is about the give and take in life. If everyone buttered each other up, we could all have a little more happiness. Which is fair, and not unreasonable in today's age. But, you know what is easier? spreading hate, blocking, and shaming people. Something about social media is so polarizing in today's youth. And to be honest, it is a good thing more than it is a bad thing. If not for social media, I wouldn't know people I would genuinely care about me or want to talk to me. I wouldn't be able to express my humorous musings online or write about anxiety and get it out to a mass audience.

I've slowly changed my attitude. With life, you must surround yourself with positive people. Even strangers, as ironic as that sounds.

Over the past week I've learned that anxiety and mental illness is not patient. It does not really care what you have on your plate, or how you plan to deal with it. Therein lies the beauty of it all, as if you cannot move forward through it; You have never really experienced life. If you don't get the knowledge from it, then you can never learn. Everything happens for a reason? maybe? Everything happens is more suited. You must find beauty in true tragedy and pain, or else you will be consumed by your own mind/

Put some spin on your bullshit to make it more believable. I don't believe in much, but, I believe putting a different spin on your issues will make life a little more liveable.

Regards,

Devon.